Stories, Sickness, and Self

The migraine I’d been suffering from week before last turned from a two day episode to a nearly five day episode. To say that it rattled me and my plans slightly would be an understatement.

I’ve always said it’s important to be honest about whatever sickness or things that come up and limit my time for projects. It was a hard lesson I learned about having a chronic condition and one that I continue to work through even now, twenty years later. With all of the work I’ve done and acceptance I’ve come to, I realized that I still have wanted to put “limitations” on what they are in my life. I realized as I was battling through the migraine that the truth I was telling myself about my migraines was that they were only “allowed” to affect me within certain limits. As each day went by, I spiraled into my frustration and shame (I know, silly as that is) about my migraines and as the pain started to fade I was able to see what I was doing to myself. It took slamming face first into those limitations again to remind myself what the real truth of dealing with a chronic condition is and realign to handle it. One of the things I did do at the end of this episode was reach for a book. Not just the book I listened to on Audible when I could drive again or my Kindle before bed, but actual, paperback books. I went to my shelves and thumbed through some old favorites, checked in with my to-be-read (TBR) pile, and even stopped into a bookstore. I picked a couple of titles that were top of my list and let those stories pull me in as I recovered.

I did end last week with only a twinge of a headache and my feet mostly underneath me. This week my hope is to do some work on each of my projects. I’m in the middle/end of chapter two in MS:TS and I’m ready to get back in there with the sisters as they experience the very hard event they’re about to come on. Where this scene/chapter ends, the POV (point-of-view) will switch in the new scene to the other sister. It will be the first time we see her in the narrator’s seat and I’m excited to start to explore her view more in-depth. There is so much I know of her from writing the first draft and the planning I did for this one, but I know the writing I’m about to do is going to bring me an even deeper level of understanding of who she is. I’d also like to send out a few queries for MS:D and work on the interviews of my family member. Now that I’m feeling better, my motivation for each of these projects is calling me and I’m excited to answer that call.

In case you haven’t been told today, you are more than enough.

With you in words, Nikole

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